Monday, November 24, 2008

poetry: dr.field, my mentor professor~

when i go to see dr. field he tells me
he believes in me,
that a lot is invested in me, 
that it's not going away.
this is it, he says.
this is my life now, i think. 
but he tells me that the point where my goals actualize into something
will happen; 
he shows me this with his hands, 
always talking with his hands, clasping them, 
showing me with his fingers moving like a river over the other.
he tells me i'm brilliant, 
that there are people whose hearts are with me, 
"because you of all people, 
had to deal with this thing;
of all the mundane things to have to deal with:
he is right, it is mundane.  
and that is what most people will never understand. 
we both tear up, looking away for a moment.
i take my hat off, 
feeling the static electricity coming off the ends of my black hair.
i think of walt whitman, 
the body electric.
and i remember why i am here. 
that i can stand up and walk out of his office, 
awake, electrified.
that i can move, one foot in front of the other, if it is all i can do at times.
that i am moving forward, 
even as the river seems to move past me, 
i am a part of it,

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