but you know, as fast as 2008 has gone by, i am filled with so much gratitude at how much i have grown, changed, evolved, accepted, rejected, opened and closed many doors and windows in my life. while one aspect of what we define as 'healthy' in my life appears to have shut down, other aspects have opened making me more healthy, more happy, more whole...in ways others will never know unless they embrace their lives just as they are: broken, confused, diseased, empty...only to realize these are merely cycles that allow us to empty ourselves of the waste, only to be filled and renewed with new truths, new joy, new hope.
to paraphrase derrick jensen, sometimes you need to lose hope...in that, you are holding out for change to occur within something (or someone) that inherently cannot or will not change.
make a new hope. make a new year.
much love and peace to all of you,